They Walk Among Us

[Charles Parker]

H. B. You may very well be right. Just a couple of cards. Certainly feasible although most of the time when they run out of lift cards they put them on a sheet of ruled paper.

I have seen the film in the camera bit before. One guy I know had two homicides back to back and it was at the tail end of the second one when he determined he did not have any film in the camera.

I honestly do not see how someone could do that, but he was living proof. Luckily they were slam-dunks and not who done its.

Oh well.

[L.J.Steele]

CO Inmate Sues Jail, Says Escaping Was Too Easy
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Scott Anthony Gomez Jr., breaking out of Colorado's Pueblo County Jail, for the second time, fell as he tried to rappel on bedsheets down the side of the 85-foot building. Now, the Los Angeles Times reports, he is suing the county sheriff, saying authorities caused his injuries by making it too easy to fly the coop.

Filed this month in federal court in Denver, the case has attracted attention statewide and on the Internet, mostly from people chuckling and fuming at Gomez's legal efforts. "It doesn't pass the straight-face test," said Pueblo County Sheriff Kirk Taylor, who took office one day before Gomez's second escape one year ago. Taylor said security was a priority during his first year on the job. Built in 1978, the five-story jail had weaknesses, including a sub-par door-locking system in which prisoners did "have the ability to pop their cell doors," Taylor said. Intended to hold about 189 inmates, the jail routinely housed 300, requiring the use of bunk beds. "You give them access to the ceiling because of the second bunk," Taylor said. In last year, the sheriff has spent $1.2 million to improve security, including welding shut the ceiling panels and overhauling the door-locking system.

http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld ... &cset=true

[Ann Horsman]

The best one yet:

http://www.theindychannel.com/news/15051234/detail.html#

[sharon cook]

Oh, Ann, that is too wonderful for words! Hope he didn't give himself brain damage!

[Fredja]

On my first few days right out of the academy, my partner and I had a domestic dispute call. We arrive to the house just to find a very excited guy and a young woman in tears. Not soon the guy saw us he aproached the window and threatened to commit suicide and when my partner tried to aproach him, he jumped right out.... simply forgeting he lived in a ground floor apartment and the window was less than a meter far from the floor.

[L.J.Steele]

I just had to share this one:

The prosecutor stated that eyewitnesses would say Brower was in a dispute with the victim, went to his van and pulled out a hammer, and hit the victim in the head with it, piercing the victim's scalp and causing him to suffer seizures. Brower testified under oath and admitted he fought with the victim but adamantly denied striking him in the head with a hammer. On cross-examination, when the prosecutor suggested that police would come to court "with a bloody hammer," Brower again denied using any hammer but asked, "After this is over with, can I get my hammer back?" Despite his claim of innocence, Brower said he desired to enter an Alford plea rather than take the risks of a jury trial at which he could "win big or lose big."

BROWER v. STATE, 230 Ga.App. 125, 495 S.E.2d 600 (Ga.App. 01/08/1998)

[Thomas Taylor]

Brower again denied using any hammer but asked, "After this is over with, can I get my hammer back?"

If I had a hammer,
I'd hammer in the mornin'
I'd hammer in the evenin'
All over his head.

[michelleewaldron]

I had an officer bring me five or six black lift cards a few weeks ago and after looking at them with various lighting techniques, I decided to remove them slowly from the lift card to see if there was in fact anything there. The officer had dusted with black powder and lifted several excellent finger, joint, and palm impressions and placed them on black backgrounds. Identifiable impressions were visible on all lifts after they were transfered to white cards.

[Pat A. Wertheim]

Hi Michelle

An officer did that to Carey Chapman about fifteen years ago in the state lab where Carey and I worked in Arizona. Carey phoned the officer and asked what in the world possessed him to use black powder and put the lift onto a black card. The officer responded, "It was a black car. I thought we were supposed to use a card the same color as the car."

That's about a whole order of fries short of a Happy Meal.

[gerritvolckeryck]

Some 20 years ago, a patrol officer of the Antwerp police arrived at the lab with two beerbottles, which were recovered from a burglary scene. The bottles had been far from empty at the time they had been put in the plastic bag which was handed over to a colleague of mine. Observing the floating bottles, he shouted : "i won't examine this mess! Tell your chief we need clean objects if he wants us to find finger prints."
Half an hour later, the patrol officer was back at the lab with the beer bottles : "My chief cleaned them personally."

Gerrit

[Dennis Degler]

[Pat A. Wertheim]

An incident in Tucson a few years ago should have resulted in a winner of the Darwin Awards, but for some incomprehensible reason "Mr. Jones" escaped notice of that venerable judging organization. This is a true story from the Tucson news. Only the names have been changed to protect the innocent. Okay, maybe I changed the names because I can't remember the real names of the parties involved.

But back to the story. The "Smith Family" was preparing for church one Sunday morning -- Mr. Smith, Mrs. Smith, and Daughter Smith (age 16). I believe there were a couple of other little Smithletts in the family, but that detail is a little hazy in my mind. At any rate, Daughter Smith had just got her beginner's permit to learn to drive and asked her father if she could drive the family to church. Mr. Smith didn't see any danger in that and agreed. The Smith Family piled into the big four door extended cab truck with Daughter Smith driving. Mr. Smith was in the front seat, and Mrs. Smith and the rest of the Smithletts were in the back seat. A couple of blocks from home, a dog dashed out in front of the truck and, despite her very best efforts to avoid hitting the poor animal, Daughter Smith ran over the dog. The dog wasn't quite dead and ran howling and bleeding up into the front lawn of the closest house whree it collapsed, while the Smith Family piled out of the truck to attend to the it. The dog's owner, Mr. Jones, came running from the house and upon seeing his mangled dog expire on his lawn with the Smith Family milling around it, he went into a blind rage of anger, screaming and cursing. Mr. Smith recognized imminent danger and rushed the family back into the truck, himself taking the wheel this time, while Mr. Jones attacked on the verge of physical violence. As the Smith Family all made it into the truck and locked the doors, Mr. Jones began pounding on the doors of the truck, screaming and kicking and cursing. Mr. Smith started the truck and began to leave. Mr. Jones jumped up into the back of the truck and, seeing a spare gasoline can, took the top off and began pouring gasoline over the cab of the truck and the bed. By now, the truck was rolling and, seeing what was happening, Mr. Smith accelerated pretty quickly. Mr. Jones took his lighter from his pocket to set the truck on fire and flicked his bic just as he tumbled from the truck. Unfortunately for Mr. Jones, he had spilled gasoline on his pants and apparently some had splashed onto his shirt, as well. The truck escaped the flames, but Mr. Jones erupted into a human torch. Mr. Smith, seeing this in his rearview mirror, screeched to a stop and bailed out to go back and save Mr. Jones. Alas, Mr. Jones was too wrapped up in flames and although Mr. Smith got him to the ground and rolled him around to put out the flames, Mr. Jones joined his dog right there on the lawn in their journey together to the afterlife. He was still alive when the ambulance arrived, but he died in the hospital an hour or two later.

Tragic as it might be, in the daily routine of police work this one struck me as . . . unusual. Maybe it doesn't belong on this thread, as Mr. Jones no longer "walks among us." But I always thought it was a shame poor Mr. Jones didn't win the Darwin Award for removing himself from the gene pool. He certainly went out in a blaze of glory.

[Charles Parker]

The Ungainly Robber

Officers responded to a call of a robbery at a local Stop and Rob and made the following report. A young male had come into the store about 1:30pm and brought a soda to the counter and then asked the clerk how much was it. When the clerk responded the YM said he only had a dollar and went and put the soda back. About 45 minutes later the same YM came in and picked up a pack of gum and brought it to the counter and pulled out his dollar bill. The clerk rang it up and as soon as the cash drawer opened the YM tried to reach over and grab the money but was too far away. The YM then attempted to vault over the counter at the same time the clerk closed the money drawer. The YM caught his foot on the counter and went tumbling on the floor at the clerk’s feet. He gets up and grabs the cash register and wrestles it over the counter. He then carefully slides over the counter and grabs the register and takes off towards the door with the electric cord training behind him. He takes a few steps and his foot comes down on that cord which immediately brings him down and he slides across the floor and bangs into a series of shelves headfirst with the cash register coming down on his hands. He slowly gets up the second time and makes his way to the door. One of the other clerks recognizes him as they use to go to school together. The detective arrives and the story is relayed to him in between the smiles and laughter. The detective responds that he knows that YM as well. A few minutes later the Detective goes outside and starts to get in his unit when he sees a car driving down the road very slowly. He recognizes the passenger as the YM who is now a suspect. He radios the patrol unit that had just left and they turn around and stop the car. They get both the driver and passenger out of the car and the driver goes into a prone position while the passenger upon getting out starts to ‘Rabbit’. As the officer chase him he heads for a steep slope. Needless to say his feet on the slope cannot keep up with his body moving downhill and takes a dive on the ground, rocks and debris. They secure the YM and drag him back up the hill. Later upon questioning he acknowledges he is the one who robbed the store just about the same time we identify his palm print to the latent print lifted off of the counter at the Stop and Rob. All in all not a good day for one young robber.

The Fingerless Burglar

Several months back our palm print AFIS started spitting out some positive returns on latent to latent searches (go figure). We would pull these cases to see if an officer or CSS had made both calls and no, each investigative group was different. We then pulled the cases in attempt to run fingers in the state system, but most of these cases had no or only a few latent fingerprints but had lots of latent palm prints. Recently a young man was arrested for the first time for Burglary and the AFIS starting turning out the reverse searches. In one group we had 6 Burglaries on this one YM. Everything was verified and in notifying the lead detective on the majority of the cases it was mentioned that we made over 48 latent palm prints but not one fingerprint. We thought that kind of odd. Some time goes by and the detective calls me up and tells me he now has the answer as to why there was only palm print. It seems this YM in his confession tells how he was very careful not to touch anything with his fingers because he as seen TV and knows that a person can be identified by his fingerprints so he handles everything with his palms. The face of his palms, the edge of his palms and even the base of his palm but never with a finger. Come to think of it I guess the popular TV shows only show fingers being identified and not palm prints. I am waiting patiently for the foot print burglar.

[PC]

Not sure if I already shared this true story before, but it is one of my favorites. Early in my career, when the ratio of case load to staffing was more manageable, we sent out form letters to victim’s where latent prints had been obtained requesting the victim to submit their fingerprints for elimination purposes.

One evening a white male adult dressed in bibbed overalls and a white tee shirt (AKA: good ol’boy) came in to submit his elimination prints. When I began to take them he stated that he didn’t understand why we needed to do this as he knew the prints we got from his burglary were “Mexican” prints. Confused, I asked him if he or anyone else witnessed his burglary. His answer..”Nope”. Even more confused I asked him how he knew the suspect was “Mexican” if there were no witnesses. His answer..”The officer told me they were “Mexican” prints”. I tried to explain that there really is no way to tell race or gender from fingerprints left at a crime scene. From the patronizing look on his face I could tell his mind was made up. After listening to my explanation he calmly told me..”Well all I know is the officer told me they were Latin prints...Latin-Mexican, they are all the same to me”. At this point I gave up as there was no way I could possibly explain that the officer obtained LATENT prints, with a straight face. I thanked the man for coming in and assured him we would do our best to find that Latin burglar.

[Cindy Rennie]

They Walk Among Us re-redux. (Couldn't resist these!)

Actual call center conversations!

Customer: 'I've been calling 700-1200 for two days and can't get through; can you help?'
Operator: 'Where did you get that number, sir?'
Customer: 'It's on the door of your business.'
Operator: 'Sir, those are the hours that we are open.'
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Samsung Electronics
Caller: 'Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?'
Operator: 'I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about.'
Caller: 'On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I
need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and
telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the
number for Jack?'
Operator: 'I think it means the telephone plug on the wall.'
----------------------------------------------------------------------
RAC Motoring Services
Caller: 'Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am
traveling in Australia?'
Operator: 'Does the product name give you a clue?'
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while traveling in Europe)
'If I register my car in France, and then take it to England, do I have to
change the steering wheel to the other side of the car?'
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Directory Enquiries
Caller: 'I'd like the number of the Argo Fish Bar, please'
Operator: 'I'm sorry, there's no listing. Are you sure that the spelling is correct?'
Caller: 'Well, it used to be called the Bargo Fish Bar but the 'B' fell off.'
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.
Operator: 'Woven? Are you sure?'
Caller: 'Yes. That's what it says on the label -- Woven in Scotland .'
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On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a worried operator:
'I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the number on.'
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Tech Support: 'I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop.'
Customer: 'OK.'
Tech Support: 'Did you get a pop-up menu?'
Customer: 'No.'
Tech Support: 'OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?'
Customer: 'No.'
Tech Support: 'OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this
point?'
Customer: 'Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'.'
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Tech Support: 'OK. At the bottom left hand side of your screen, can
you see the 'OK' button displayed?'
Customer: 'Wow! How can you see my screen from there?'
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Caller: 'I deleted a file from my PC last week and I just realized that I need it.
So, if I turn my system clock back two weeks will I get my file back again?'
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This has to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired.
This is a true story from the WordPerfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the
customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently
suing the WordPerfect organization for 'Termination without Cause.'
Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee.
(Now I know why they record these conversations!):

Operator: 'Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?'
Caller: 'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.'
Operator: 'What sort of trouble??'
Caller: 'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words
went away.'
Operator: 'Went away?'
Caller: 'They disappeared'
Operator: 'Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?'
Caller: 'Nothing.'
Operator: 'Nothing??'
Caller: 'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.'
Operator: 'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?'
Caller: 'How do I tell?'
Operator: 'Can you see the 'C: prompt' on the screen?'
Caller: 'What's a sea-prompt?'
Operator: 'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?'
Caller: 'There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't accept anything I
type.'
Operator: 'Does your monitor have a power indicator??'
Caller: 'What's a monitor?'
Operator: 'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV.
Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?'
Caller: 'I don't know.'
Operator: 'Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where
the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??'
Caller: 'Yes, I think so.'
Operator: 'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's
plugged into the wall.
Caller: 'Yes, it is.'
Operator: 'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that
there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just
one? '
Caller: 'No.'
Operator: 'Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and
find the other cable.'
Caller: 'Okay, here it is.'
Operator: 'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into
the back of your computer.'
Caller: 'I can't reach.'
Operator: 'OK. Well, can you see if it is?'
Caller: 'No.'
Operator: 'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean
way over?'
Caller: 'Well, it's not because I don't have the right angle -- it's
because it's dark.'
Operator: 'Dark?'
Caller: 'Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is
coming in from the window.'
Operator: 'Well, turn on the office light then.'
Caller: 'I can't.'
Operator: 'No? Why not?'
Caller: 'Because there's a power failure.'
Operator: 'A power .... A power failure? Aha. Okay, we've got it
licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and
packing stuff that your computer came in?'
Caller: 'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.'
Operator: 'Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it
up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to
the store you bought it from.'
Caller: 'Really? Is it that bad?'
Operator: 'Yes, I'm afraid it is.'
Caller: 'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?'
Operator: 'Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer!'